Without Resolution
But still with Purpose
I last wrote about a painting that brought up swirling feelings about the West, Chief Joseph, and the loose ends that always seem to happen after conflict. I was working on that painting in the hope that I would complete it in early October, the time when Chief Joseph surrendered.
I did not.
It was too much to do before a looming deadline, too many competing ideas never worked out beforehand, so I set it aside and started another, much simpler painting that I knew I could complete for the show in Denver. That painting is of a rocky cliff outside of Cody, Wyoming that is colorful and clear, a candy-like distraction that any viewer would stop for a second to view.
Before I show that picture, let me show you a progression that demonstrates how following an idea without reference can lead to never-before-considered places.
The green image is “Jacob’s Rest” and was just going to be expanded onto a larger surface (the original idea), and the other images show the progression of “No More Forever” - the painting that became about Chief Joseph.
See how the image followed a feeling, and not a reference. This is perilous, especially when dealing with a deadline.
Below is the replacement image: big, simple shape and vibrant colors. Easy to look at, even if not original or thoughtful. People will be drawn to this, even if for a few seconds.
For most painters, that would be enough. It is a difficult task to get anyone to look at a painting for longer than a glance, so spending 8-10 seconds looking is a big win. Having it be purchased is something usually too far out of reach to even hope for, but we all hope for a long glance.
Moving on. We all must just move on without satisfying outcomes. Regardless, there is the next thing, so we can move from small hope to small hope, reaching for the next hand grip, the next place for our feet to push from, horizontally if we must, just to stay alive in the dream - in the hope.
For hope is like a bubble, swirling iridescent, more fragile than breath, but also strong enough to be a shelter, the blanket we pull around us and our loved ones as night falls. We light the fire and watch the flames for a while before the chill and weight of night, the weight of expectation, drives us inside.
On good nights, we dream.
Other nights are restless.
But in every night with rest, there is hope. We hope that the faithful sun will rise and new opportunities and solutions will come with it. We hope for loose ends to be tidied. We want compartmentalized resolutions, and a new day may bring them.
The unfinished work lingers somewhere within us, on the borders of our consciousness, a coyote just inside the woodline, the smell of smoke unseen.
Whatever replaces the unresolved work may be good, it may give satisfaction, but it cannot, for me, erase the knowledge that something important was unresolved. We must meet again, this idea and I, in one way or another, and the arts wear many masks. Will it return to me as the first wash of a sketch? Will I be reenergized by lyrics? Will the written word create the impulse to rise and hunt?
Even without resolution, we can still press on. We must. Perhaps we lower our gaze and reset our will. We check in with ourselves, reevaluate our intentions, and listen again for the small, quiet voice that has never failed us. For a believer, it is the times of uncertainty that can clear the mind’s cobwebs and actually serve to calm us by reminding us of our top priorities.
The deadlines have passed now.
I met them all and did the best I could do. Perhaps something positive will come of the effort. Now is the time for calculating shipping costs and delivery schedules, how to transport big, bulky boxes to FedEx Office (usually they max out my Subaru Forester), and all that comes with finishing a job.
I’m so thankful for these stresses, having known far worse. The stress of being invited to do good work and show with real, actual professional artists is … amazing, and the wonder of it still fills me.
So, I give thanks.
I pray to God to bless the work of my hand. I hold these works loosely, knowing that circumstances change so fast. Contentment is elusive and a struggle to obtain, but looking over the work of several months done between other jobs, I let them all go, I release them to God, praying that I can learn whatever I need to learn from Him and the showing up, from the practice of conjuring images from prayers of thanksgiving.
With that, I’ll share with you the products recently completed for two different shows - the Maxwell Alexander Black Friday Show and the Coors Western Art Show.
First, three small images for the Maxwell Alexander Black Friday Show
”Contested”
“Wyoming Study”
“Ten Sleep Daydream”
The following 5 images are for the Coors Western Art Show (the cliff shown previously is the 6th).
The first three are small, the others are large.
“Different Sails for Different Seas”
“Meeteetse Provision”
”Beatitude”
“Recessional”
“Negotiations”
This is where I leave you. Each painting was made because I gave thanks for being present in the locations depicted. I was there. Making prayer out of paint is quite a challenge for me.
If you are one of the few that have made it this far, please accept my sincere thanks. I would write about what I do anyway (because it is important for us all to do so), but I know how niche this is. So, thank you.